The Hits Keep On Coming

It's hard to emphasize enough how good it is to be a fan of Playboy throughout the 90's and 2000's so far. There was a lull in production for a 2-5 year period in the early part of the new millennium, but now it looks as if Playboy has its act together. What do I mean, precisely?

Well, just look again at Jo Garcia. I gave her my one and only perfect A+ on October 17th, and she's come out with three new videos since. And let me tell you, those weren't just any videos. I'd advise you to go to her page and check out, in particular, Video Two of her "Come Hither" series. Once you see it, you'll melt. Jo just lays on the bed flat and writhes and bends in sexy ways that I've never seen any girl, Playmate or Cyber Girl, ever do before. Not only that, but she's exceptional at doing what she does. I'm telling you, Jo Garcia is one of the most perfect girls I've seen in Playboy in ages... she's got a slim figure, she's very tall and supermodel-like, she has a strikingly exotic face, luscious dark hair, a nicely groomed crotch, unusually large breasts for such a skinny girl, and to top it all off, she's a textbook poser who sets the bar higher than anyone I've ever witnessed. Photos don't do Miss Garcia justice. And if she loses the CGOY award, then it will be, indeed, a true injustice.

That said, let's look towards our current Playmate of the Month, Miss November Lindsay Wagner has a dirty blonde look with plenty of attitude and edginess. Not a whole lot of things set Lindsay apart from the crowd, except for her rock hard body. Once you see her photos, it's hard to argue that Miss Wagner is one of the more athletic Playmates we've seen in a long time. And whether or not muscles are to your taste, Lindsay does it tastefully and does it right... for the most part.

Lindsay takes on lots of looks throughout her Playmate portfolio pictorial. The most potent of which is the kickboxer. Lindsay looks oiled up in these shots, and strips down slowly, exposing her picture-perfect tone. Pic 4 is a good starter, showing Lindsay's total package of a piercingly sexy look and an awesome body. With those dark eyes and that pouting stare, it's easy to say that Lindsay is a winner. And she really is almost all the time. Here's one thing she does great: slip down those panties in a sexual downward-looking pose.

In the bedroom, Lindsay loses some of that edginess, but gains some playfulness that she lacked earlier. This pic is cute and suggestive, with that smile cracking the aura of toughness that she has in her gym photos. Still, to use Lindsay in a submissive role wouldn't cater to her strength, which is as a rough and tough young girl. That stare can't be compared to, and it's really what she does best. Again, Lindsay and those panties are a great match. She does the shot so well because of how her abs just look tough and her body is statuesque. Pic 14 shows a little that crosses the line for my tastes, as Lindsay looks almost masculine in her toughness, with bulging biceps that almost look too toned. Lindsay then goes back out of her element, being playful and getting frisky on the bed. Her partial grin is wholesome and bright, and although she's not at her best, it's obvious that she's proving that she is Playmate material.

Those blonde locks of tied-up hair, that glistening, sweaty body, and those gorgeous dark eyes make Lindsay a great Miss November, albeit a little too athletic at times. What a year it's been... it finally seems like Playboy is getting it. Putting in generic blondes was a thing of the past. Now, they've found a formula where they actually can find unique blondes!!!! Who thought that you can easily pick apart and recognize these platinum-haired beauties, and make them so unique that they could be in PMOY contention? But it's true, Playboy might have done it. 2007 is almost over, and it's been a pleasure so far. With blonde lovelies like Heather Rene Smith, Shannon James, Tiffany Selby, Spencer Scott, and now Lindsay Wagner, how they managed to pick blondes that stood out from the crowd is beyond me.





Consensus... B+

Lindsay Wagner
Miss November 2006

#21 - Crista Nicole

Crista Nicole was Miss May 2001. The class of 2001 followed a millennium opener complete with a bevy of some of the greatest women in Playboy history... girls you'll surely see later in this list. 2001 included lovely faces like Lauren Hill, Jennifer Walcott, Dalene Kurtis, Lindsey Vuolo, and Shanna Moakler. Crista needed lots of muscle to edge out some of these wonderful women, but she does it with grace and expertise.

Crista is unique because her body's proportions are outstanding for the kind of height she has. A 5'9" leggy sight to see, Crista is still 34C-25-35 and still full of bodily goodness. That unusual combination is what sets Crista apart from what you've seen in other Playmates. She's simply got amazing proportions for such a model-like "runway girl" type. This lets Crista use her body in interesting ways for interesting positions in the photos taken of her. She does things that other girls simply can't and that's what made her one of the great Playmates in history.

Crista has some unbelievable looks in some pictures. Start off by looking at one of her best, an a true modern Playboy classic, Pic 08. The photo is like being in a dream, with Crista's slim proportions and fantasy face all in one picture. Crista is simply too good to be true sometimes, with near perfection in her body and eyes. Crista really knows how to strike some unusual and innovative poses, with this sexy outdoors pose doing the trick. But it's this faceless behind-the-back photo that is another one of Crista's classic staples. It just speaks to the absolutely stacked body that Crista has, combined with that awesome height. Her body ripples with fitness and conditioning, too. Shadows and curves work beautifully with her body, as is shown in this dreamy pic. A true asset that Crista has is her whimsical, classy look that she pulls out every now and then. She flows and ebbs in a wonderful way throughout her pictorial, throwing sexuality and a mix of starlet-like presence into a concoction of success as a Playmate. The wholesomeness is felt clearly in Pic 41 (a bubble-butt to be reckoned with), while the artistic goddess-like glow is palpable in Pic 43. She gives you that look, and you know she's one of the more memorable ones.

Crista was one of the quintessential hard-bodied, tall goddesses of the Playmate world. She was stacked to the max, physically outstanding, not to mention her centerfold was flowing and elegant, and one of the greatest ever. Crista's impact on the Playboy world might not seem immediate, but she was one of the standouts in a renaissance period that began in the late 90's and continued into the start of the new millennium. It's strange, though, that it's Crista's classic, bombastic look that makes her so amazing in an era of "new ideas" and "natural thinking." But it's her over-the-top appeal that makes her #21 and one of the great Playmates in history.

Like a Dream

I would normally wait for a girl's entire pictorial to come in before talking about her pictorials, but let me tell you, Playboy's found a real winner here that I can't wait to get out to you. Jo Garcia was recently named the October 2007 Cyber Girl of the Month, and I anticipated it from the get go. But I never could have understood just how stunning Miss Garcia is when she's given a chance to shine and blossom.

As a CGOM, Jo is magnificent. She's got two pictorials out already, and those are enough to drool over. They're absolutely perfect in a year lacking many good CGOY candidates. Besides Kortnie O'Connor, who I gave rave reviews, there's been little else to get me excited about the nomination of an annual winner. It took them seven more months, but they've found her.

In her first pictorial, titled "Savvy," Jo's body is immediately bronzed and eye-catching. Jo just looks incredible naked, plain and simple. But it's not just her DD natural breasts or sexy long legs that do it... it's mostly her attitude. Jo hits you with a relentless onslaught of sexuality, like in this photo, where her legs part and the sex just oozes. In her videos, Jo is even more amazing, flashing a stare that's tough not to melt over. The looks that she shoots towards the camera with her naughty eyes are the stuff of legends, and shots like this doggy style number are reasons for setting Jo in the upper echelon of Cyber Girls.

Still, I didn't get an impression of Jo's greatness until I looked at her second pictorial, "Daydream." This really does on a number on any fan. It's completely lit with natural light, and Jo is amazingly beautiful in each and every shot. Jo begins with a gorgeous, simple lacy lingerie outfit, with the natural lighting already showing off her luscious skin tone. She temptingly takes each layer off, stretching her body and showing the smoothness with which she flows. Jo's long legs and great height show in this photo, where her 5'7" frame comes in handy. George Georgiou's legendary photography adds to the sensuality of this pictorial, where every shot is brilliant, including this emotional one. All throughout, Jo's body is the fixation of the pictorial, and this laying down shot is magnified by looking between her lovely legs.

If you haven't seen the entire pictorial yet, check out "Daydream." It's one of the most impressive pictorials that Playboy has ever published. In fact, Jo is one of the most flawless women to appear in Playboy for months, maybe even years. I absolutely cannot wait to see what else she pulls out for the rest of this month, almost as much as I couldn't wait to give Jo a rating. She's certainly my choice for Cyber Girl of the Year so far, and unless Misses November and December are revolutionary beauties, Jo looks to be a major frontrunner. Sorry, Kortnie, but Jo just has a natural knack for posing in the nude. Absolutely amazing.

So without further ado... the only perfect score so far!



Consensus... A+ CERTIFIED HOT

Jo Garcia
Cyber Girl of the Month
Pictorials 1 & 2

October 2007

#22 - Gillian Bonner

Gillian Bonner was Miss April 1996, bringing on the digital age as what was probably the first software developer-Playmate. The late 90's were a golden age for Playmates, as each year delivered more and more incredible girls. The Class of 1996 included Kona Carmack, Priscilla Taylor, and the luscious Jennifer Allan. But it was this Georgia peach who took the year with grace, and undoubtedly was the best that the year had to offer, and came out on top as one of the great Playmates of the 90's.

Like the Playmates we've seen so far in the countdown, it takes a certain uncanny sense of how to work the camera to be great. Carrie, Cara, and Heidi all did it with talent and grace. What Gillian did was take Cara's unique face, Carrie's awesome sexuality, and Heidi's posing ability, and put it all into one package. Gillian immediately comes off as mature and experienced in her posing, and puts her body into positions you've never seen before. More than that, her body is realistic and unbelievable all at once. Its proportions are excellent, and her face makes you want to wonder what's going on behind those mysterious eyes. And those lips... those lips! Just watch and you'll know what I'm talking about.

Gillian's portfolio is vast, and you'll want to leaf through all of the photos to get a good picture of her amazing range. But there are plenty of classics to be picked out. Check out this photo of her crawling, and this sexy one, too. They're part of her yellow top pictorial, and one thing that immediately jumps out is her smile. It's a wide-open, lips-spread, sexual oddity of a smile. It makes appearances throughout her work, and it's one of the sexiest things ever. Gillian looks amazing in her office pictorials, wearing sheer black and looking sexual and wanting it. I've always felt one of Gillian's best photos was Pic 18, on the beach and totally nude. It conveys a sense of playfulness and carelessness that gives a different look at this working woman. Back in the office, another classic is Pic 24, one of my old faves because of the awesome expression on Gillian's face as she strips off her thong. Instant classic!! Gillian's breasts aren't anything to be snuffed, as she's got brilliant ones. Gillian's areola were large, and her boobs were plump and tangible through photos, yet looked undeniably natural.

Gillian had the ability to shift her look throughout her pictorials, like in this photo. One of her finest photos of all time is Pic 31, a simple photo with a simple smile, showing off a simply wonderful model. Her makeup, production, setting, costume, and everything else comes together in this picture. It perfectly complements this photo, which gives you the big picture of how all-around amazing this girl is. On the motorcycle in another shot, Gillian is edgy, but back on the beach, she's wistfully graceful. It's astounding how much variety and range can come out of a single model, and with Miss Bonner, the hits just kept on coming. Whether it was a closeup staredown or a kinky pose with loose lingerie, Gillian did it right every single time.

I think that most of these girls so far were very underappreciated as Playmates, like Cara, Heidi, and now Gillian. Gillian brought to Playboy one of the most consistent, productive, and out-of-this-world models ever. She had it all together with an innate charm and edginess that could satisfy any fantasy. After looking at the photos, I don't think I need to explain further why Gillian is my #22 Greatest Playmate of All Time.

#23 - Heidi Sorenson

Heidi Sorenson was Miss July 1981, an icon in the dawn of a new era for Playboy. In the early 1980's, Playboy found Gig Gangel's style, Lisa Welch's innocence, Kim McArthur's ass, and Linda Vaughn's wisftfulness all bringing up new things to talk about. The era was the first time pubic hair was shown in full force, and the first time models were allowed to truly explore the creative landscape. But none of these girls did as much to set the standard for beauty as much as Heidi did. A Canadian sweetheart with a strong heart and artistic background, Miss Sorenson was a freshly mature model with plenty to show off.

Heidi's unbelievable quality of creativity shows in her photos flawlessly. She was incredible in finding new and revolutionary ways of posing, and using sets and props to her advantage. No Playmate before her did what she did, and very few afterwards have been able to replicate it. Heidi's ability to blend in completely with the scenery made her an incredible new talent. It can be argued that it was the photography of the times that makes Heidi so amazing even today. The photographic techniques and shadowing flaws of the past make photos of Miss Sorenson incredibly life-like and natural, not to mention a little whimsical and dreamy.

Heidi was one of the most beautiful women in Playboy history. Her hair blew in the wind, her body was bronzed and gorgeous. Heidi was way ahead of her time... look at Playmates in 1981 other than her, and then look at this photo. You'd swear that Heidi was posing twenty years later, in 2001. What I mentioned about Heidi using settings to her advantage is apparent from her "river-rinse" pictorial. It starts off with a panoramic shot, very artsy and intriguing right away. Heidi is seen completely nude and washing herself in a stream or pond. The next photo is one of the great photos in Playboy history, Pic 14 of Heidi's pictorial. Here, she's the quintessential blonde goddess, with her hair glowing through with the sun in the background, her body glistening with water, and the look on her face absolutely amazing and photogenic. The photos continue in the fields, with this one capturing that browned body. Other amazing shots include the painter, the bedsheet (a great display of an alluring set of eyes), and an outright nude shot showing off her great posing posture.

After that fantastic photo portfolio, there's no doubt Heidi Sorenson is one of the greatest Playmates ever. That's why she's my #23. Her unbelievable bleached blonde look and great talents were timeless, and still capture the essence of a Playboy model today. Even now, girls emulate the example set forth by ladies like Heidi, and she's definitely made her mark for years, although other big names of the 80's may sometimes be mentioned before her.

#24 - Cara Wakelin

Cara Wakelin was Miss November 1999, in an era when Playmates got bustier and the years got sexier. Gorgeous Playmates sprung up month after month, and Cara was one of them. An oft overlooked Playmate because of the exciting Class of '99, complete with Bergman, Fuson, Sokolova, Spicer, Rovero, Cline, Paterson, and Richards, Cara has a lot to prove. This Austrailian-Canadian beauty caught the eyes of real fans of the magazine.

Cara was a very dynamic poser with a smooth technique and beautiful milky skin. Her unique face and dirty blonde hair capture scenes with a natural look and feel. Speaking of natural, her body is the definition of natural. A true outdoorsy gal, Cara's own body is a natural wonder. It's not overdone or underdone, just a perfect balance of breasts and butt.

The main thing I think tells Cara's story is her body. You have to see her to believe her, and you really have to appreciate female beauty to understand everything she has to offer. Cara is the ultimate display of the feminine charm that make women so wonderful to look at. Just look at her stare, and it conveys a playful youthfulness that Cara does unlike anyone else. Some of the series in her pictorial are absolutely jaw-dropping, because of the smoothness of Miss Wakelin's awesome body. Check her out here, and here. Like I said, you have to see her to believe her. Her nudity is so unforced and flawless, without a single hitch. There's nothing that makes it seem like she's trying too hard. She just does it with ease. This classic photo stresses that, and it doesn't stop, with photos of her fantastic bush. This full body shot is one of my favorites... Cara mixes the "cute" with the "raw" as she meshes her smooth nudity with braids and a golden smile. The pictorial then shifts to the bedroom, where Cara turns utterly sexual and her body lights up with gold.

Top it all off with one of the great centerfolds of all-time (curvy and simple, that's how we like em!), and you've got a winner.

All around, Cara is almost second to none when it comes to straight up nude, natural posing. That's what she did best, and that's why she's my #24. Ultimately, it's unfair that Cara was one of the most underrated Playmates of all time, but she's finally gotten her due.

#25 - Carrie Westcott

Carrie Westcott was Miss September 1993, in a year when stars like Echo Johnson and Jenny McCarthy got their starts. But it was Carrie whose dynamic presence really ushered in a new era of grittiness and heavy sexuality in the Playboy world. The early 90's were dotted with stars like Barbara Moore, Anna Nicole Smith, and Suzi Simpson, but Carrie sticks out among them all.

Carrie's significant height (5' 8") and perfect proportions (34-24-34) were easily visible anytime she got in front of the camera. Most of all, however, her pictorials are varied and full of dynamic zeal throughout each photo. She never looks the same in any two photos, and she has so many facets to the character she creates, it's astounding.

One of Carrie's classic shots is the raincoat. Simple, yet Carrie flashes her signature cocked-eyebrow stare at the audience. Let me tell you, nobody's better at looking lean and mean like Carrie. Carrie, indeed, did have very natural breasts. They weren't large by any means, but they were substantial. She flashed her cute smile from time to time, breaking the trend and mixing things up. On full display, Carrie's lightly steamed body is a sight for sore eyes. But Carrie's best photos are there when she's just playing around, being sexy and edgy, like in her classic lingerie strip-tease here and here.

It's no mystery what makes Carrie my #25 Greatest Playmate of All Time. It's a combination of all the things that put her into one sexy package. She was a Playmate with some of the best variety of any girl out there, and she was a staple of the 1990's that could have, and should have contended for a Playmate of the Year spot. We love you, Carrie.

The Countdown Begins

I just want to announce a new feature that I'm about to start here on PlayboyCritic...

Playboy's Top 25 Playmates of All Time!

Now, this will mostly be concentrating on girls within the more recent years, but takes into account models since the early 1970s. It basically concentrates on the impact that the models have made on the Playboy community, and the overall beauty and posing abilities of the girls. It's a very subjective ranking by myself, but it's also a way to break the mold of traditional Playmate rankings, by giving each one a fairer chance. Heck, you might even see some ladies that you hadn't heard from in a while!

So every once in a while, I'll post an entire entry dedicated to one Playmate, counting down from #25 to #1, and going through classic photos that won them the spot among the Playboy ELITE.

It should be interesting...